Sturgeon's Law

My record is closer to 600. I received a letter after 18 months on my first sub to weber studies from the editor that it took so long because he was trying to 'drum up support.' I believed him and made anotrher submission. That one lasted even longer. Right now, I am going to wait for the right moment to sucker punch Hayden's Ferry Review. It's my firm belief they have lost my sub to them (seeing they get really defensive every time I ask them for an update). I am going to wait another 52 weeks or so, then ask them, no, dare them to produce my submission.
 

My longest, thus far, is Gulf Stream. In August, it'll be two years. I sent them an inquiry after six months, and I got an e-mail response that began, "Dear Mr. Impatient." No kidding. Fuck those guys and Modern Haiku too.
 

Kalliope has my record - two years and counting! They accepted a friend's poem after two years once. What up?
 

"dear mr. impatient" hahahahha

Gee, I'm lame. Longest is 311 days from Sentence.
 

My sister goes to ASU and I asked her if she knew where the Virginia Piper Center is (where Hayden's Ferry Review is) and she said that she smelled pot smoke coming from there one time.

Maybe that explains it.
 

Jeannine:

Kalliope had mine for 77 weeks.

Ash:

HFR acted as if it was an honor to be considered for such a long period of time.
 

I sometimes get rejections of submissions that I don't remember sending out.

Perhaps I should work for HFR?
 

I haven't had any really insanely long waits for a response -- usually I send a query before it gets too ridiculous, with a polite "answer or I'll try elsewhere" deadline. Cuts down on the waiting time.

I did, however, once get a "thank you for your patience, we're still considering your submission" letter from a magazine I'd never sent any poems to. (I'd bought a sample issue from them a while before that, and I guess they got their mailing lists mixed up...)